Why yes, I believe I would like fries with that.

                The topic of this entry is quite a simple one: hamburgers.  Not people from Hamburg, I don’t know squat about them, so I’m not qualified to talk about them.  Other than to say its funny that they’re called Hamburgers.  Chortle.

                No, no, I’m talking about grade A, 100%, all beef, cooked to perfection, served up on a warm bun, and sold to me for about $1.  Yes folks, I am a connoisseur of the $1 hamburger.  Sometimes it’s $1.19, or $1.29, but if it’s over $1.50 it better have bacon and cheese and come on a plate with no paper wrapper.  Don’t get me wrong, I fully appreciate a fantastic $5 burger, mostly on Tuesday nights at Crave (they’re fantastic).   There’s just something to be said for the underappreciated bargain burger.

                First you ought to know that if there is a $1 hamburger out there, chances are I’ve tried it.  I used to be a huge fan of the 88 cent McDonalds double cheeseburger, despite its weird grayness and the sinking suspicion that the “beef” was not entirely what it was supposed to be.  I followed the McD’s double for years, as it slowly inched its way up to 99 cents, then $1, and now to $1.29.  It’s been replaced on the Dollar Menu by the “double with cheese.”  Big difference: only one slice of cheese.  Lame.  And to be honest, that little slice of yellow cheesey goodness made all the difference.  (The double cheeseburger’s only saving grace now is that as some McD’s you can get it with green chile, that’s pretty sweet.)

                More recently I’ve been big on Wendy’s and their lineup of cheap burgers.  My typical order there used to consist of a Texas Double Cheeseburger, a Jr. Bacon Cheeseburger, small fries, small Dr. Pepper.  $4 used to go a lot further than today.   The Texas has been replaced by some kind of double stack thing, and the Jr. Bacon runs ya $1.19.  Cest la vie.

               Where does that leave us today?  The Justaburger.  Whataburger really does have some awesome burgers, and the Justaburger may be their best deal.  Its’ still 99 cents, which gets you a decent sized burger with mustard and onions.  You can add cheese, bacon, jalapenos, a freakin onion ring, whatever you want for just a bit more.  I’m all about throwing a couple of those little guys down my throat when I’m in the mood for some quick comfort food. 

                So next time you see me, offer me a burger, I’ll be more than happy to tell the whole world what I think of it.  My culinary delight will most certainly bring your burger world renown and all the trappings of fame and fortune that come with it.  Or just buy me one cause I’m broke all the time, and really, you’ve got a buck you can spare.  My cardiologist will thank you later.


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